What are you building? Holy Spirit asked me in a more stern and serious voice than I expected. I realize this is a serious matter to Him. I shift uneasily. I’m taken aback by His question.
In my heart, I know I want to give Him the right answer. That answer which is in line with my heart of hearts and His heart. I want to build His Kingdom and not my own flourishing agenda or empire. Still, I confess that having a fairly passive income on the side is tempting and something I have been chasing after (with little success I might add).
What’s important ministry or business? Holy Spirit asked me again a few weeks later. I find myself once more wrestling with the temptation for more money vs following the road less travelled. Let’s face it, we all want financial freedom, the cherry on our cake (plus the whole cake).
A flash from the past
Instead, I see my 5 year old self with shining eyes and a burning desire to be a “missionary ballerina” just so poor people could be treated to a free ballet and still hear the amazing Gospel of Christ. Fast forward to my teen years, and I’m the girl who wants to counsel and minister to people who can’t afford a professional counsellors fees. I remember my parents lovingly trying to help me see that I can’t do everything for free because I need to make a living.
I realize that this is still who I am. Although I am now a wife and homeschooling mom of 3 boys all under the age of eight, my heart burns with a desire to glorify Christ and build His Kingdom. I still want to hear people’s stories and help them work through it.
The Truth is:
My answer to Holy Spirit becomes one of I want to build Your Kingdom. I want to be in ministry.
For some people having a successful business is building God’s Kingdom which is awesome. Those people are to then surrender to God’s plan for their lives.
Right now that’s not on God’s agenda for my life. My focus and priority is largely on my family and that’s ok. My second priority is to let go and be me which translates into writing and helping women find their purpose and identity in Christ.
God’s Kingdom is dynamic not static
You see building God’s Kingdom translates into different things for each of us. We build God’s Kingdom when we partner with what God has on His heart for our lives today.
Sure, I long to have the utopia or ideal world where I can travel all over the world sharing God’s redemption and love to people from different backgrounds and church denominations. Today, that’s not God’s priority for me. If I try make that happen now, I’m building my own empire and sacrificing the very thing God has asked me to nurture and grow – my marriage and my children.
If I don’t surrender to God’s plan, I will look back on life and experience regret. I don’t want that. Do you?
You see, God doesn’t wag his finger in front of our faces with a stern look and say Thou canst only be in ministry; business is forbidden. (I’m giggling to myself just writing that J ) No, He is not a cookie cut God. God’s plans for your life are one puzzle piece in His big picture and His plans for me are another puzzle piece. Together, they contribute to His finished picture.
Surrender to God’s plan
Whatever God has laid on your heart to do, do it to the best of your ability. God rewards faithfulness. He will bless you. Faithfulness is Kingdom. Excellence, honour, integrity, love, generosity, etc…, are all Kingdom when we do it with the Lord.
Jesus said that He only did what His Father did. That is how Jesus built and proclaimed the Kingdom of God. This is how Jesus was able to accurately portray the Father’s heart to the world. The same applies for us whether it is being a SAHM, working mom, entrepreneur, artist, carer, and so on.
Making the choice to surrender to God’s plan
So, with this in mind, I choose to stop chasing money and building something that is not on God’s agenda for my life today. I choose instead to be faithful with what He has entrusted me. I choose to enjoy every moment with my children and husband. I choose to be true to the purpose of my mission – to help you encounter God’s heart and live in the reality that He loves you fiercely. Finally, I choose to trust God that as I am faithful in sharing His heart to others, He will add the financial side.
Seek first His Kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be added to you. Matthew 6:33
Maybe, just maybe, its time to focus on what’s really important – Jesus! If He really is who He says He is (and I know He is) then all the desires of my heart and yours will be fulfilled in His precious time.
For now, I’ll be faithful and trust Him.